Hide our feelings

When you are diagnosed with anxiety at an early age, especially in your teenage years, it can be a difficult thing to deal with. Especially with those around you, some of who don’t quite understand the messy thoughts that run through your head.

So when you live in a world where having a mental illness or any type of mental health problem is surrounded in stigma. Surrounded by this dark cloud that hangs over us. Like we’re something to be feared.

So what do we do? We try so hard to hide our feelings. To hide our anxiety. To hide what is causing these things. By staying quiet about them. By pretending that everything is okay. That we are alright. That there is nothing wrong.

However, we often forget that our eyes say way more than our words ever could. For instance, this past November I went to a wrestling convention. It’s kind of like a comic con but with a bunch of wrestling. I usually go with my husband by my side.

Except…..he wasn’t by my side. Instead. he was working the event. So there I was standing alone in line, surrounded by a lot of people I didn’t know. My anxiety grew so big I was ready to bolt. To run. But I knew doing so would tip my husband off to what was wrong and he wouldn’t be able to concentrate on the job that he was doing. So I pretended.

But that didn’t work. One look in my eyes, even from across the room, my husband knew I wasn’t okay. He knew my anxiety was up. He knew I was ready to go.

So even when you think that you are hiding it very well…. Those who are close to you. Those who truly know you and truly care about you…. they are the ones that are going to be able to see the words that aren’t coming from your mouth. No! They are the ones who can hear ever silent scream coming from your eyes.

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Don’t suffer in silence 

There’s so much stigma around mental illness, it’s ridiculous honestly. I’m not even sure why 20% of Americans should feel like a burden because of a chemical imbalance in their brains, seriously. When you look at all the stigma (its everywhere, especially social media) It is no wonder why thousands upon thousands of Americans (and all over) suffer in silence.

We really shouldn’t have to though. Unfortunately, until the stigma ends, many will.

However, I think it is very important that anyone who has a mental illness has at least one person that they can talk to without any judgement.

I have 2 (3 if you count my husband wanting to help) Well my 2 is more like 1 1/2 because one is super busy.

My other 1 has a mental illness too. I’m her person and she’s mine. She told me once that just being able to hang out and talk lightened her mood. So you see having that kind of friendship is extremely important.

No one should ever suffer in silence. So if you need a person to talk to.. I’ll listen just drop a comment.