#Relationships and #Anxiety

I use a lot of these, and people use some of these on me and they seem to work

Having a sturdy, healthy relationship with anyone can be a beneficial thing to have when you have anxiety. Having that one person that is there… that can help you.. that can pull you out of that dark place can be amazing.  When I say relationship… I don’t mean just a relationship with a significant other… Relationships could mean your mom…you brother/sister or even your best friend.  It is vitally important for someone suffering anxiety or depression to have that one person that never judges….and always understands.

I sometimes like to scroll thru Pinterest just to pass the time. There are things that others have posted from Tumblr or other sites. That is when I found the picture from above. And I thought… hey this I can write about and just possibly explain why these are important. This way if you have someone in your life that suffers from anxiety.. you can learn a few comforting words that might help. Alright. Here we go….

 

“It’s ok, I’m here”

Knowing that someone is there for you is very important. With anxiety…it can sometimes feel like we’re all alone in this world. Having that one person that is there for you and never judges and is willing to try to help you pull out of that dark place is very important. This should always be the go to phrase when someone you love is having one of those days.

“I’m not going to leave you”

Ah yes. With anxiety we sometimes feel alone. Or at least I do. I have quoted the line from One Tree Hill all the time…. ‘people always leave’ Therefore, when someone like my husband sticks it out and puts up with all my anxious crap and continues to tell me that he will not leave. it is a little reassuring. and allows me to center myself.

“Everything is ok” 

Yeah.. this one phrase is not my favorite. To me, saying everything is ok is like telling me its all in my head. Because at that moment…everything is not ok.. This might work for your anxiety…but it doesn’t work for mine.

“I’m going to protect you”

That is sweet. As someone who suffers from anxiety.. I think it is sweet that someone is willing to protect me from my demons even if I am the only one who battles my demons. But anxiety is so draining. When you go thru an anxiety attack it is as if you have ran a marathon. It is tiring. All I want to do is sleep but I can’t.

“I believe in you”

Considering that there is all of this stigma about mental health. Especially anxiety disorders. I have heard that I am making things up. I am wanting attention. I am a cry baby. It’s all in my head. I can pray it away. I just need to stop thinking like that. Its not real. etc… it is quite annoying. However, to hear someone stop and say hey.. I believe in you. I know your demons are real. I know this is something that is actually happening and I believe in you to beat this. If your significant other or friend or family member suffers from a mental illness… BELIEVE IN THEM

“Hear my heartbeat, focus on that”

This is something that can help someone be pulled out of an attack. This isn’t a technique that I have thought of trying. However, I just might have too.

“You’ll be alright”

I know that there is more to that quote. However, the first part kind of makes me upset. I know that it shouldn’t. I know that they’re just trying to help. But it is kind of like being told hey cry baby you’ll be alright.

“You’re not going to lose me”

I find this one to be very significant. Know that the person who understands you. who never judges you. who is always there for you isn’t going to leave. That is an amazing feeling.

There are many more of these amazing ways to help someone with anxiety. If you have someone in your life who suffers from anxiety…take a look at these sayings. Maybe these can help you help your loved one.

The picture below details just a small amount of what being in a relationship with someone who has anxiety is like. This is something I feel is true. There are days where I just want to be alone. There are times that we’re out with friends or even family and something happens and I just want to go home. There are days where I just want to lay in bed (but it never happens. I am a mom…. I have to take care of my girls. and I do. I have learned how to put my fears aside to ensure that they are well taken care of. I don’t understand why people believe that anyone with anxiety are bad parents. We’re not.. we just ‘worry’ more)

 

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Well guys…let me know what you think

#MakeChesterProud

So the Chester memorial is on tonight. And I am just one big ball of feels.

Every song hits right in my emotional gut like being kicked in the stomach. I’m crying….a lot….and its ok…I will be ok….we will be ok.

Chester sadly passed away a couple months ago. It had been a very well known fact that he suffered from mental illness and that mental illness is what led to him leaving us.

No its not fair. And I know that sounds so bad for someone to say about anyone who has passed. But its not fair. Not just because as a fan we wont get to hear any mew music from this lyrical genius. He was a father a husband a friend a leader and much more. He was a person.

Whats not fair is depression and mental illness. Theres help available. We know that. Well at least we do now since Chester left us. Depression and suicide prevention has come to the front lines….finally.

There is a hashtag on twitter that Talinda promotes…and so do I. Its #FuckDepression. Because really if im going to be angry or sad or say Fuck You to anything or anyone for Chester it would be depression.

I hate depression. I do. And I hate when I’m depressed. It happens. Okay. Don’t tell me its life. Dont call me a cry baby. Dont tell me others have it worse. Just don’t.

Its actions like that…that caused many people to not get help. Sometimes…we need help. We do. Depression sucks.

Depression hurts. It hurts so bad. Sometimes it hurts so much that we become numb. Being numb is better than constantly feeling the pain.

The thing is….Chester knew that. He could relate to us on a personal level. We relied on him. We waited patiently for the new albums so we could hear more songs about how we felt. Thr true fans that is. I’m not talking about the ones who complained every time an album came out because it didn’t sound like the 1st one.

If anything comes from tonight show…i hope it helps people who are suffering to find a way to get help. No matter what anyone says….ever….getting help is not weakness. It is strength. As a fan, I wish that I could have helped Chester. Maybe just a little.

I know this sounds like a rambled post but im watching the show…bawling like a baby…. And needed to get some thoughts out…please share yours

#OneMoreLight #MakeChesterProud #FuckDepression