There is a lot of debate that this generation of parents is raising a generation of snowflakes…. There are actually a lot of debates about what we should and shouldn’t do as parents. Like spankings are too rough for our kids. I believe in popping a child on the behind if the action warrants it. In our house…that is the LAST resort. There are many other punishments that our kids have to go thru before they get to the spanking portions. Actually, I think I have only popped our oldest once on the behind and that was for pushing her baby sister off the bed.
However, one thing that lacks in our society is respect. Now I believe that my kids should listen to and respect me as their parent. That I will always do what is best for them and to follow the rules that have been set. However, I also believe in showing my girls respect. If they don’t want to hug their uncle, they don’t have to. I am not going to demand that they hug someone that they don’t want to. I also believe in talking to the kids. It is showing respect in the simpliest ways. Instead of just yelling and that being the final word. I show my girls respect by having conversations with them so that they fully understand what is going on and why they are in trouble. (if they have done something) This is a time that I either call a ‘come to Jesus talk’ or Understanding time.
I have seen way too many parents yell or discipline their child with that child not understanding what they had done wrong. Kids are in school Monday thru Friday for hours a week. They are learning new behaviors and things from their friends and other kids that are around them. These behaviors may not be okay in your household. However, punishing without explaining why it is wrong is really hard for the kid to understand why it is not okay to not do that.
Now this is in no way of saying let your kid run their own life from the get go. Oh HECK NO. I believe in parenting. I believe in old school parenting. But I also believe in talking with your child. It is a simple respect thing. You show your kid enough respect to talk to them about what is going on in the house…then they’ll show you that much more respect because you are seeing them as a human being rather than just your child. your possession. They will also be more willing to come talk to you about some of their own issues. By showing your kids a little bit of respect, you’re opening an environment where they can feel comfortable with you. My mom did this with us all the time. She was a single mother taking care of three kids. Sometimes her check couldn’t cover every single bill and feed three growing kids. So she would sit us down and explain that her check was going to be short and that she wasn’t going to be able to cover this bill or that bill and it would usually be right before the next payday that it was due. Like this one time the water bill was due 2 days before her next check and we had already gotten an extension because bill just racked up being a single mom in a state where she had no family and the water was about to be cut off unless she paid the bill in full. So she sat us down and asked what we thought about the situation. She could either pay the bill or buy groceries. We chose food. We only went 2 days without running water. But we had planned ahead and filled up jugs so that we still had water. But it was things like that that made me respect my mom even more. She didn’t have it easy considering her entire family was on the other side of the US. She was literately doing this by herself. I still hold that respect for my mom and try to do anything I can for her.
Respect….it is a two way street.
you want your kid to respect other kids and other adults…. They learn that behavior at home. From their parents.