I think that when you suffer from a mental illness, you know how bad things can get. Therefore, you try even harder to make sure no one else gets that way. Or at least that is the case for me. I know how bad mental illness can get so I suffer from a ‘superhero complex’ and try to help EVERYONE. All the time. My husband says that I am always too nice. that I do things for others without being asked. Like making food for his training class. 4 weeks in a row. without being asked.
but sometimes…. people see that kindness in you….and they exploit it. they take advantage and use the best way that they know how to exploit your sympathetic bones. Sob stories. Guilt trips. You name it….there are some people who see that you are a helpful person and they will constantly use you until you are bone dry. I actually knew some people, they were my husbands friends not mine…at all….who get everything from cars, food, clothes etc from begging others. They drain you dry. I remember them calling my husband the day he got paid or the weekend after he got paid asking for 200 bucks to pay their light bill…because they cannot keep a job….well the husband can’t keep a job, the wife refuses to work.
They dried everyone up around them……
There are so many people out there like that…. and they will leech off of you until you are down to absolutely nothing….
And it is okay to say no.
Like you do not have to give everything you have to someone who won’t even help themselves. How can you truly help someone who doesn’t want to help themselves? You can’t. Honestly… you can’t…until they are ready to help themselves…..they will constantly be leeching off of you until you’re worse than they are…..
So….if you’re anything like me…you’ll need to learn how to say no without explaining yourself….. you don’t have to explain to anyone why you are saying no to anyone. I think the only people that I explain my actions to are my husband, my kids (I explain why we say no) and my mom.
But if there is someone in your life that has leeched off of you….. or constantly bugging you to do something with or for them… you can say no….without explaning yourself…