Anxiety is funny.
Don’t get me wrong. Mental health is not a laughing matter. There is nothing to joke about when it comes to a mental illness.
What I mean is.
I was having a good day. We get those. They come like a ray of light just before a storm.
That’s why anxiety is a funny thing.
I was having a great day. We got the closet that was full of good will stuff cleaned out and taken to good will. We got the rest of the mulch that was here before we moved in cleared and I gave it to a family member who needed it but didn’t have the funds to get any. I went and got soil and flowers to put a flower bed in. Now my front yard looks amazing. We got so much done.
But as I am driving back to the store to pick up a few last minute things. I started thinking.
I’m having a good day.
My anxiety is chill today.
And thats when the storm hit.
While I was at the store my husband text and said our youngest was throwing up. Great! just great.
So I hurry home and my oldest is throwing up.
Then my brain, while trying to take care of two sick kids, starts to think about finances. How much money did I really spend today? How am I going to replace that? I really need to find a job from home. I need to clean the carpet. How am I gonna clean the carpet and make sure that they’re not choking on their vomit. Needless to say, my hubsand ended up sleeping on the couch with the yougest making sure she didn’t throw up laying on her back and I slept half on a twin mattress with my oldest making sure the same thing. My oldest loves to sleep on her back so every time she rolled onto her back I was wide awake.
and it never fails. Whenever I am having a good day. My brain automatically goes into the where’s the anxiety? Why aren’t we stressing? Why aren’t we anxious? Which then turns into an anxiety mode.
Anxiety, my anxiety, is a funny thing. But having a mental illness isn’t fun, funny or a laughing matter.
Just another day in the life of ThisAnxiousMom.