Anxiety and Depression are hell

quotes-Depression-is-when-y

Depression can make you not care about anything. And that can be hard to describe because you have to care in order to be depressed right? What you cared about might have caused you to become depressed. Well to me not caring about anything is not brushing your hair because why bother….not getting out of your pj’s because…why bother. Not taking a shower every night because….why bother. Why bother doing anything right? It can be hard.

I am depressed. I have depression. I was not diagnosed by a dr. We live in America. Where you pretty much always make too much for government insurance…ie medicaid or too little to be able to afford insurance… So I cannot go to a dr or therapist even tho..I am pretty sure I need to and to get back on medication.

When you have depression…you can’t just get over it. That’s just not something that happens. I hate when someone tells a person with depression to just get over it… Now there is a difference between being depressed and using depression as a means to seek attention. I know someone who has been ‘depressed’ to get people to care about them. They cut themselves and threaten ‘suicide’ for attention. But when people finally start paying attention and trying to get said person mental health and get them checked into a facility…they’re suddenly cured with nothing wrong with them.

These type of people…give mental illness a bad name. And it is not cool. Seriously. Just stop doing it.

Having anxiety is caring too much. I am a very anxious person and I care about every single thing. My daughter threw a tantrum and I started feeling very anxious because people were staring at me… I just knew they were judging me as a parent. I know  I shouldn’t care…but I do.

Having anxiety and depression is like living in hell. You don’t care about taking care of yourself but care about how others look at you. And that is just one way of thinking about it. There are many ways to perceive how anxiety and depression are awful when you have them together.  I hate it. I really do. It’s like caring that my daughter is freaking out causing attention but feeling like the the worst parent in the world because you don’t know how to stop the tantrums. This is my life….. and yes…I did bawl my eyes out in my car after she had a tantrum

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Categories: anxiety

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